Thursday, December 23, 2010

my kids

I love saying "my kids". I can't describe the feeling that gives me inside. Such a proud statement. ;)
I came across this pic of Kaia yesterday and realized we have the exact pic of Finn. Can you tell which is which?

Finn and Kaia looked almost identical at birth. Finn just looks like a boy version of her. I'm in love with my family. Disgustingly in love with them. Typical mother hen. lol.

Happy 4 month birthday!

Wowie Zowie! Finn is 4 months old today. And just like the little bugger he is, he waiting until today to grab his feet for the first time. Heck yeah! I've been trying to get him to do this for a long time now. I talk into his feet, and he loves it. Giggles and giggles.
Tried to get a photo of him grabbing them, but he never cooperates with that. So, here's in between grabs!

Little dude is now, hmmm, I really don't know for sure, but if I had to guess, I'd say 14 lbs. He's not super chubby, but has some chubb. He's not a huge eater. He's more of a grazer, which is a little tough through the night, but at least he's still good at nursing. I know he'll only be little for so long, so I try not to complain about waking up too much.

We've definitely noticed that he's very opinionated. He's his mother's son. lol. His favorite toy is his sunshine that Auntie Jen (not my blood "relative" Jen, my earth relative Jen) got him. He loves to suck on the rays.
Finn and Mr. Sunshine

Finn's got the funniest hair. It's short in the back but long right behind his ears. And I mean, super long! Like 3 inches long. We call him our little Hasidic Jew. You can't see it really good here (and this was over a month ago when he had more back hair and shorter side hairs), but I love the back of his head.
Finn loves to type on the keyboard. 

Today we got a new washing machine. I know this isn't the most exciting new to everyone out there, but, trust me, if you lived with the washer we're using now (you can hear it a block away. I'm not kidding) then you would be stoked. We got a LG front loader steam washer, which is going to clean our diapers so so much better than the old washer. There's a load in now, in fact. :) Not to mention the energy efficiency of it. It's eco-friendly! Hooray!

We have a big Christmas planned with Christmas Eve at the Urban's, Christmas morning at our house, afternoon at Eric's sister's house, and Christmas night we'll drive to PA to spend time with my brother (can't wait to see him!) and my dad, stepmom, stepsis & her man, and my nephew. We have definitely seen our fair share of blessings and miracles this year. There is definitely peace in our household, and I hope it's in yours, as well.

Love & light!
The Urbans

We are a family of four.

Peace on earth.

Monday, December 20, 2010

VA Beach

Finn had his first real road trip. We trekked it to VA Beach for my cousin's wedding. Finn did amazing in the car and LOVED socializing with everyone. We've come to learn that Finn has a rough time sleeping (meaning he just won't do it) if there is ANYTHING at all going on around him. He's got to be in the action at all times.

My cousin was in the Navy. So we found it appropriate to put the little sailor outfit (that the Troubadours bought) on Finn. Here's a pic.

how cute am i?
With my pops!

Finn got his first picture at the ocean with his Grandpa Randy.

Then we walked down to the beach where daddy held him tight.
How sexy is he?!

He also took his first swim! Here's a pic and youtube video. He loved it and even kicked and did frog legs. :) His little arms were doggie paddling. I was so proud.
I even have a cloth swim diaper!

Here's the video:

It was so great having the family together. It's not often that I get to see all my aunts and cousins and grandma too! It wouldn't have been possible without my Aunt Jodi getting the amazing beach house...well....any Michael and Nicki getting married. ;) I love you all! Hugs to my amazing family!

tiny footprints

Look at these. I finally did it. Finnegan's hand and footprints....

I meant to do this when he was first born, but, let's face it, NOTHING gets done when  you have a newborn. A good friend of mine, Galen, sent a wonderful little gift package for Finn. She makes some really amazing things for kids and some pretty nifty adult invitations and such too. Check out her etsy shop. One of the things she sent in her package were these adorable little note cards. There are 4 different designs, but these two worked best for hand and footprint cards. I'm going to mount one on a fabric covered canvas and hang one by ribbon in Finn's nursery. :) The other three go to Finn's grandparents. I'll post a pic of the nursery art when it's done. For now, here's the cutie hand/footprints.

tiny footprints can make some big steps

Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Finn is 3 months! (and has been now for a week)

Swimming on the bed.

HOLY MOLY time flies! Finn is 3 months old, and I feel like I have a toddler already. I'm sure those with toddlers are saying, "you just wait, woman." But he is SO BIG. He weighs almost 13 lbs and is like 8 feet tall now. ;) I am so amazed each day by how much he learns. He literally wakes up every day with a new talent. I swear he learns them in his dreams. Sometimes he wakes up and looks different. Overnight! That's just crazy to me.

Things have been smoothing out a bit around the Urban household. We're establishing a routine now that is being led by Finn. We have bedtime at night in a good routine and the morning nap all set. The only thing left to work out is getting him to go down for his afternoon nap at the same time each day. I figure that will come with time. He's still not sleeping through the night, and I don't expect him to until he's on solids. I get up with him about 4 times each night for feeding and changes.

So far, we're still doing great with nursing (knock on wood cuz there were some rough times I didn't think we'd get through.) Finn is breastfed full-time right now as to avoid nipple confusion, which he was starting to get when we giving him pumped milk in bottles at night. I would say it was confusion though. It was more like "screw you, mom. I want the fast method, and I know you are going to give it to me if I freak out on your boob and scream for an hour." It took one day of only putting him to the breast, and he was back to normal. I was so proud of him. He's an amazing learner (and relearner!).

And to all those nay sayers that said we would give up cloth diapering in two weeks, I say "I told you so!". We've been 100% cloth 100% of the time, and I find it extremely easy to manage. I'm quite proud of our diaper stash. He's just now pretty much grown out of his newborn Kissaluv diapers and we're moving on to our stage 2 and beyond stash of BumGenius, Fuzzibunz and GroVias. So far, the GroVias (which I had high hopes for because they are uber cute and a righteous idea) fall short of impressing me and the Fuzzibunz are winning. We do have 3 types of BumGenius, all of which I'm super happy with. All in all, I think we are set with diapers for life....all for around $450-500 total. Sweet!

Enough of that. Let's get to the fun stuff! Here's all the stuff (that I can think of right now) that Finn can now do.

1. He smiles and laughs like crazy! I gave him his first airplane ride and he laughed and giggled so hard he could barely catch his breath. It was so funny. When he wakes up and sees me, he smiles so big, which makes it a-okay for me to wake up 4 times a night for him. ;)

2. He kinda sits up on his own now. I video taped it yesterday, because it was the first time he sat up and played with a toy. He can't do it for a very long time, but will for a few minutes.

Just the dudes being dudes.

3. He talks. He loves to have a conversation. I talk, he talks, I talk again, he talks back. He's quite the conversationalist.

4. He digs his walker. Seriously, he's been in that thing for a month now, which is insane! He loves to play with the toys that are fixed on the tray. He has always been able to move the balls from one side of the arch to the other.

Walker = fun times!

5. He holds his own bottles. No joke.

Holding his bottle

6. He can pick up objects and loves to rub his crinkle blanket in his face. Anything soft he'll rub on his cheeks.

7. He loves to hug.

8. He's saying consonants as of yesterday. They are clear letter sounds instead of just unrecognizable babble.

9. He's doing great with strangers now. He went from not tolerating other people (other than me...not even Eric!) holding him to (since Thanksgiving) loving other people holding him. He even let Aunt Tina babysit him for Eric and my first night out. :)

With the Troubadours of Divine Bliss. They came to see him when they were in town.

10. He now acknowledges the cats and follows them with his eyes as they walk by. Up until this week, he never knew they were there.

That's all for this month. Stay tuned for more Finn updates (hopefully) each month. Although I might skip a month here and there like I did for month 2. What can I's crazy busy with a baby and there's always more fun things to do than put the baby down to type on the computer. ;)

Happy holidays from the Urbans!

Wednesday, November 17, 2010

Finn's first photoshoot

my cutie patootie son
He's quite the model! My good friend Shannon offered to shoot him, and, of course I jumped at the opportunity! She did an amazing job! In fact, I would highly recommend her if any of you need photos for ANYTHING (she does it all!). Check out her blog

Just look at this amazingness! Don't you just want to eat him and squeeze him and love him to pieces? I do. Well, I do that anyway. :) I'm so blessed to know this little man. He's growing up so fast! Updates on his "can dos" to come soon!

Finn kept petting Kaia's urn, which led to this picture "We are Family".


Who can resist those eyes?

Nakedness rules on soft fuzzy rugs!

Discovery channel - NICU

I was just flipping through channels and, to my surprise, heard the name "Dr. Ross Ungerleider" mentioned. Holy moses! That was Kaia's surgeon. He was on this show on the Discovery Chanel called "NICU". Apparently, the show went to University Hospitals in Cleveland to shoot this episode about a heart baby and her surgery....the same place Kaia had her surgery. I found it quite interesting that, for the show, the baby that was operated on got to go back to the NICU after her open heart surgery. In real life, they put these babies in the PICU after surgery, where, I believe, they receive a much lower quality of care. I watched the remainder of the program and it just made me angry. I still have a lot of anger over the situation. I listed to the mother of the child speak about her experience. Her words were so familiar "Numb", "It's hard because I can't hold her", "all I can do is be her mom and love her", "You can't believe it's part of your reality", "I've never had to deal with such uncertainty in my life", "I've never had to dig so deep for strength in my life". All thoughts and emotions we felt day in and day out. I watched her break down overtop of her baby as she dug deep for that strength to go on. I heard all the beeps of the IVs ... a sound I never wanted to hear again. It's haunting. I found myself crying for this woman in her pain, as well as for me in my own. I'm left angry, knowing that they allowed this baby to remain in the NICU because of tv, when Kaia was put in the PICU. These emotions spilled over into thoughts of my relationships (or non-relationships) with my estranged family. Ugh, and I still want to sue the pants off the hospital. Damn that show for dredging all of this up. I'm leaving it here and moving on with my day.

Tuesday, November 9, 2010

New schtuff!!!

Well, I finally did it. I finally got prints of my artwork made and ready to sell. Get any one of your favorite LLD pieces now in an 8x10 matted print. These prints are matted to 11x14, and have a crisp black bevel. They come complete with backing and in a bag with the title of the piece and artist's signature on the front and an LLD sticker on the back. They are GORGEOUS! You can see the details of ...the fabric beautifully, and the color is very true to the real thing! I have over 70 prints ready to ship right now! Order yours today on my etsy site. Here's the link to the prints

And new pieces are up! All are for sale on my etsy site.

Lastly, I have another show coming up this Saturday at St. Bernadette's in Westlake. If you're interested in coming, there's a facebook page set up for it here.
Here's the details:
Time: Saturday, November 13 · 9:00am - 3:30pm
Location: St. Bernadette School/Parish Activities Center
2300 Clague Rd.
Westlake, OH 44145

That's all for now. LLD will also be in 3-4 locations during the entire month of December. All of my work will be out and about town so I can concentrate on finishing Christmas orders and taking our little trip to VA Beach. :)

In Light & Love,

Sunday, November 7, 2010


I need not say a word. Total gangsta cuteness! Wha wha??!!

4 generations

I'm so behind on my updates. About a month ago we headed to PA to see my Grandparents before they headed to Florida for the winter. It was so great to have four generations of us together. Having kids has shown me the importance of family, and I cherish these moments. What an amazing thing to ssee my grandparents hold my son. Pictures! Pictures!

Finnegan and his Great Grandma

Finnegan and his Great Grandpa

Great Grandparents have lots of love to give!

Naptime with mommy.

Finn and his great Aunt Jodi

Finally we got a complete 4 generation picture.

Just the dudes!

Gram, me & Finners

Hey ladies! My cuz Beth, mamma Jackie, Auntie Jodie & Grams!

Saturday, October 9, 2010


It's posts like these that make me long for this in my own life. This mother truly supports her daughter, and it's a beautiful ode to motherhood. God bless this mother and her devotion to her child. I aim to be this to my own children.

letter to my daughter in wake of tragedy

Thursday, October 7, 2010


Finn is now 6 weeks old. He's growing so big so fast. I've been so caught up in taking care of him that I haven't been able to keep up on what's going on in the CHD world. Yesterday I logged on just to catch up. My heart broke to find out that nine babies...NINE...lost their lives in one week. I would be lying if I said I haven't thought about Kaia so much more since Finn arrived. I've cried more in the last six weeks than I've cried in months. I watch him grow and realize how unfair it is that she wasn't given that chance. And I relive it all when I read what these moms are going through. Their blogs are chock full of the same feelings I had. Their pain is now, and mine is a little less harsh, thanks to time. But reading their stories can bring it all back in a quick paragraph. This pain will never subside. It will never go away. It may be a little numb from time to time, but it will always come back to a waterfall of tears and bouts of sadness.

Right now, I'm aching for these families. I want to reach across the miles and hug them and not let go. I want to tell them everything will be alright, even though it never will be.....never again. It can't be because it's not alright. CHD is not alright, and frankly, it really pisses me off that it is so common and not much is being done about it quick enough. Our environment is being destroyed. Toxins are rampant. Earth is telling us that it will win. And it's at our cost. One of the mom's who lost her son this week wrote a blog that I found extremely close to home. Everything she says is how I felt and still feel. I only wish that we'd been able to be there for Kaia's exit from this world into her new life. If we'd only known it was happening, I would have been in that room, regardless of what surgeons said. Her blog is here if you'd like to read. I really am feeling this all in my heart, and it hurts.
Here's another who lost her son this week, as well. Please think of them.

Please send your thoughts and prayers out to these families. They need strength right now in masses!

Friday, September 24, 2010

Beach day!

Of course we had to take Finn to our favorite beach (Huntington Beach, Bay Village, Oh). He loved it! We took a nap in the shade while daddy swam. What a lovely day!