Remembering

Finn is now 6 weeks old. He's growing so big so fast. I've been so caught up in taking care of him that I haven't been able to keep up on what's going on in the CHD world. Yesterday I logged on just to catch up. My heart broke to find out that nine babies...NINE...lost their lives in one week. I would be lying if I said I haven't thought about Kaia so much more since Finn arrived. I've cried more in the last six weeks than I've cried in months. I watch him grow and realize how unfair it is that she wasn't given that chance. And I relive it all when I read what these moms are going through. Their blogs are chock full of the same feelings I had. Their pain is now, and mine is a little less harsh, thanks to time. But reading their stories can bring it all back in a quick paragraph. This pain will never subside. It will never go away. It may be a little numb from time to time, but it will always come back to a waterfall of tears and bouts of sadness.

Right now, I'm aching for these families. I want to reach across the miles and hug them and not let go. I want to tell them everything will be alright, even though it never will be.....never again. It can't be because it's not alright. CHD is not alright, and frankly, it really pisses me off that it is so common and not much is being done about it quick enough. Our environment is being destroyed. Toxins are rampant. Earth is telling us that it will win. And it's at our cost. One of the mom's who lost her son this week wrote a blog that I found extremely close to home. Everything she says is how I felt and still feel. I only wish that we'd been able to be there for Kaia's exit from this world into her new life. If we'd only known it was happening, I would have been in that room, regardless of what surgeons said. Her blog is here if you'd like to read. http://www.team-ewan.com I really am feeling this all in my heart, and it hurts.
Here's another who lost her son this week, as well. Please think of them. http://fierceandfiesty.blogspot.com

Please send your thoughts and prayers out to these families. They need strength right now in masses!